If Jesus implored us to be anxious for nothing (Matthew 6:25-34), then why do so many of us build our cathedralled lives around our drives for personal comfort? The whole of the Sermon on the Mount is that his people are a lighted city set on a hill squarely in the midst of dark depravity. It seems the whole of our experiences with church are efforts to turn out our lights so that those depraved zombies “out there” don’t find their way in here. Before long PTSD (Preferential Treatment because of Salvation Disorder) sets in … and we hold even our own at arm’s length for fear they will cause us some measure of discomfort. We take up the Prophet’s mantle, “Thus says the Lord Ego, ‘Thou art a distraction and a disturbance.’”
Fear happens to the be one of the best of Paul’s disciples, for it crosses the trench lines of denomination and styles of “worship,” drawing us all into unity (See I Corinthians 1-3) … yeah, a unity of anxious wafes. Oh, that we of the faithful would venture out as Fear has so fearlessly accomplished!
Several years ago I witnessed an amazing phenomenon. The youth of one particular city were drawn more to a traditional Baptist church. Even the “hip” and “cool” and “contemporary” music of the “spirit-filled” atmosphere could not compete with them. Yet, the traditions of my Southern Methodist denomination have been pillars of cooked spaghetti, unable to support a temple of worship for our youth. If tradition was the problem spawning church decline, then the Roman Catholic, Anglican, and Orthodox Churches would have died out a long time ago. In traditional and “out of the box” church groups we find churches who are driven by fear and churches who celebrate Scriptural faith. Usually there is some combination of the two groups in every church.
My wife is out of town for several days for a business trip, which means our two kids are “in town” with me. I do love my kids, but I have to admit that I like being around one more than the other. In fact I have dreaded this time … again not because I don’t love my kids … God knows I do. I have dreaded this time because one of them is simply inconsolable at times … no matter what. Last night was not fun … to say the least. This morning was even less fun. I asked for prayer for myself yesterday at church … humbly admitting that I have quite a difficult time with that particular kid. I didn’t ask God to make the time pleasant for me, but to change my heart so that I can better deal with “that” kid.
I think I may have unnerved a few people. How dare I say such a thing about my kids! I am the preacher!!! However, one lady got it, exclaiming, “Now, we’re having church!” That was the point … to have “church” in such a way that we can bring our fears and faults to one another and lifting them up as incense before our Creator who desires to re-create us. Yet, I believe it is anxiety that prevents us from opening up our hearts of wormy-manna. “What will they think if I share this?” I unwittingly played the shock-jock again by calmly telling them that I didn’t care what any of them thought of me … all I knew was that I need God.
I also believe it may be anxiety which prevents us from entering the heart-worlds of those around us to help them pull out their worms. It is certainly not pleasant to catch the overflow of pain from hearts. If we’re not careful, that overflow may become a rip-current dragging us into their cesspools.
I have officially resigned from my position as pastor of my two churches in order to pursue specifically youth and family ministry. Though I have around 20 resumes in circulation currently (more are to flow forth), I do not have any job prospects. The normal procedure for our denomination is to announce a resignation during April, for the churches hold their votes of confidence in their pastors at the end of April. I announced my resignation in January.
With a very secure job (my people truly love me and I truly love them … more than they will ever know) … with a very secure job in a very insecure economy why did I resign? Why did I resign so early … the end of July (moving time) is quite a distance from January?
Faith. In our churchy culture faith is the same as belief. We celebrate the faith once delivered to the apostles … or misunderstand it. Faith is not the same thing as belief. I believe it was James that quipped, “You believe that God is one; you do well. Even the demons believe– and shudder!” (2:19; ESV). One “faith” group had as their tag-line “faith in action.” As well-meaning as that is, ”faith in action” is a redundant statement. Faith is belief that is driven to action for a purpose. That is the faith which was once delivered to the apostles.
Out of my belief that I need to be working with youth and families more directly I resigned. That is faith. Out of my belief that I need to love and respect my people entrusted to my care I told them early … so that we can work together through this transition … so that they would not have been left hanging … so that our relationship can be nurtured. That is faith.
There are those among us chanting the mantra “avoid the politics of fear.” A whole presidential campaign was fueled by the drive to avoid the politics of fear. That campaign won. Now that President is attempting to swoon the populous into accepting his “stimulus” package … because if we don’t then catastrophe will strike … the likes of which Chicken Little never dreamed. So much for avoiding the politics of fear. Yes, faith is the conquering management of anxiety, but faith is not the squashing of wisdom. No, by urging us as Christians to avoid the theology of anxiety, I’m not aborting the process of critical analysis birthed by sound wisdom.
Rather I’m asking us to re-examine our “faith.” Why do we do some things and not others at church? Why do we consider some things proper or improper? Why do we speak to some but avoid others? How about asking ourselves those questions about our lives “outside” church? What beliefs and emotions are driving our vehicles of worship and ministry? Are we driven by fear or do we run by faith?
Is it possible we need an oil change from the Spirit of God? Our vehicles would certainly run smoother … and might just run at all. Having fresh oil from the Spirit would once again fuel our city to light up a dark and bloody world. Yet, like I’ve been told about oil changes in vehicles, if you don’t change the filter along with the old oil, the new oil will only get gunky quickly. The Spirit can send fresh oil, but unless we change our emotional process filters (or allow him to do it) then whatever revival he sends will merely turn gunky (or trashy) rather quickly.
Remember the Parable of the Talents? Who did the master praise? Who did the master condemn … as wicked? At first glance it seems really pious for that lowly servant to bury his one talent out of fear of his master. What would happen if he lost it? It’s the only one he has. However, in order for those two who received by twice what they risked, chances are they risked everything they were entrusted. Again, they risked everything they were entrusted.
That parable teaches us that the problem is not in taking risks … it’s in not taking risks. May the Lord of the Harvest raise up risk takers. I don’t need to pray that he would send them out, because by their very nature of being risk takers, they will go out and do so passionately. May the Lord of the Harvest transform us, so that we might possess a faith made of entrepreneurial belief.